Impatiens Essence; A portrait of pain
Edward Bach described himself as a "man in pain".
Not of a particularly hardy constitution, his overwhelming strength of spirit was tempered by much physical ailment. He didn't live a long life, and his time on earth was marked by much Pain. From cancer to facial neuralgia, he experienced bodily suffering on an acute level.
I find it interesting (as others have before me, no doubt) that the first essence Bach developed was "Impatiens". An aggressive, invasive plant which colonizes quickly and completely, its gesture and habits make us think of one who is set on world domination and isn't going to be content to sit back and let another lead the way. In stark and almost ironic contrast, the plant itself, when examined alone, is fragile in the extreme. Its leaves seem barely attached, the stems are thick with water and are easily broken and bruised, the flowers dangle in the breeze and are particularly complex in structure, and the seeds - the seeds explode from their pods with impressive force. A common name is, "Touch Me Not".
This plant says much to us about itself; cardinal in energy, forceful, DIRECTED, delicate, tense, explosive, structured, individual, fragile, inflexible, intense. They grow with admirable force - but the energy says, "Do not touch me". Surrounded by a multitude of their own, they choke out the interference (and fellowship??) of others. "Do Not Touch". Their bark is where the energy is, for inside, they are quite fragile and irritated to the point of distraction - they are in pain. The itching of daily life gets under their skin and causes great distress and imbalance. Bach was described by friends as being intense - quick to anger but quick to forgive. Explosive and revolutionary. Unique. Brilliant. Not afraid to go his own way and to go it alone. Strength of mind and will that was oddly out of step with his frail physical form and it irritated and frustrated him. He found his soul's echo on the banks of a river, in Impatiens. He believed the vibrational force of the Impatien's being connected with his and helped him to shift into the more positive qualities of his make-up.
Force of will is good - when tempered with patience. Individuality is good - within a community. Energy with gentleness. Structure with grace and flexibility. Mental Genius with peace and rest. Growing towards the good of All, not just to conquer square mileage.
Impatiens Essence is one of the Twelve Healers, "core remedies" as I like to call them. They speak to our native constitution - who we are with the lights out. Not that they can't be used in acute settings ("This is out of the ordinary for me - I'm really irritated after driving through rush-hour traffic), but their *best* work is done at the Heart of things. Impatiens folks are not ones who slip into the background, though they do tend to be loners at heart. They are directing their will upon the world around them. Rushing, it seems, without peace or ability to reach Content. When they are sick they resent it and "fret to get well..." They don't accept help or admit the need for it, often to their own hurt. They rest - but it is the rest of a coiled snake, ready to spring up and strike. Bach says, "Without hesitation or delay" - this is a key phrase, and Julian Barnard adds another, "If you can't do it properly GIVE IT TO ME." Folks who vibrate with energy that is almost painful - it stands out in brittle shards around them. "Touch me not, I have work to do..." But the root of the problem is Pain. Intense, fiery pain of the nerves, heart and mind. Constant, irritating stimulation of one thing or another. (This is a great remedy for certain expressions of PTSD)
Bach assigned this remedy with the virtue of "Forgiveness" which seemed odd to me when I first began to study it. And then, after my own Impatiens experience, I understood. I hurt myself pretty badly towards the beginning of July. Instead of resting, or getting help - I worked. I don't have time for this. I shrugged off the offers of help - I'd rather do it well and alone. You see, I, like Bach, am an Impatiens person. I don't think it's my "Soul Essence" (similar to your Sun Sign in astrology, or dosha in Ayurveda) but it's definitely my Assumed Constitution (your rising sign or 'chronic condition'.) I tend to live and operate in the world as an explosive riverside flower. "Don't Touch Me!" A month. A MONTH of working with healers and doctors, so many tears (of anger and frustration, mind you) and someone said, "You're shattered." So strong, but so fragile. *Brittle* And the feeling that I held in my heart was one of bitterness. I resented my body - I felt betrayed by it. I need to be able to operate at full capacity at all times. I'm not ready to be getting older and weaker. And I felt that returned - my body wasn't super happy with the way I'd been treating it. I act as though it's an annoying accessory - someone else's purse I have to hold in the store. I took Dr. Bach's prescription for PAIN - "Excruciating nerve pain, intense emotional pain and tension..." not really caring about the spiritual component, honestly, I was simply in agony. I felt my body tearing away from its own pain and anger and frustration. And it wasn't like I was suddenly ALL BETTER - but I started to *get better*.
And I forgave myself for being human; for having bones and flesh and joints. For being 30 and not 17. For being a semi-single parent. For having to use my credit card. For being in pain. I forgave a bunch of stuff I didn't know I was carrying around with me and let it float downstream. I *asked* for forgiveness as I felt my soul begin to ease and bend. I asked for help. I rested my joints. I stopped forcing myself forward. I took down my "Do Not Touch" sign. I slept. It's honestly pretty amazing. Flower Essences don't "fix" us - they help us to realign.
Will they take an impatient person and give them patience? Probably not.
Will they shift decades of learned survival patterns so that we can realign and go forward in life without the burden of chronic dysfunction?
Hell yeah. Absolutely.