What Does It Mean To Heal?

I’m reading a book by Prentis Hemphill called “What It Takes to Heal” and it’s been so gorgeous and affirming. One of the things from my heart that I hear echoed in their words is the conviction that “healing” is more than just “not bleeding anymore”, AND that our individual healing has a collective and communal resonance.
For as much as us wellness peeps talk about “Healing”, I don’t often see actual definitions of what that means- what it looks like in action.

HOW WILL I KNOW WHEN I’M DONE?!? When am I “healed”?

AM I DOING ‘HEALING’ GOOD???

How do I know when I’m *actually* Healing and not just bandaid-ing symptoms {guess what, there’s a place for bandaids in healing… you have to stop the bleeding first, folks}? How do I know that all of the mess I’m feeling means something? When is feeling shitty actually doing something important? What are some guideposts, some touchstones?

Ever the Saturnian being, I like being able to feel ‘progress’, lol. I’m not looking for some mystic belief about being well- I need to feel BETTER, dammit!! I want my various parts oiled so they work, I want my inner voice to learn some compassion, I want my trauma to move out of the driver’s seat. I want to have a cooperative relationship with my physical body. I want to move from a place of compassion and curiosity, not driven by panic or triggers.

I want to live my life, I want to be an active participant in the world *on the side of healing*, and I need healing in order to do that, which means I need to know what Healing IS. It will help me to push when and where I need to push, and how to pivot when needed. It will inform my choices about protocols and practices and beliefs I hold. It will help me to be patient and compassionate with myself in the process.

My personal definition of Healing:

~The quickening of my capacity to establish, hold, and nurture Selfness in relationship to and with Others.

~A feeling of instinctive, confident resilience and buoyancy

~The cultivation of my ability to securely and creatively experience joy, hope, pleasure and play

~The ability to engage with Life with agency and meaning.

The means for healing has looked like:

~Taking the time to seek out and enjoy friendships and fellowship where I can be authentic and secure

~Medication - hell yeah!!! And working with beloved Plant Kin who support and heal my heart, mind, body and soul. I can’t even express the gratitude I hold for Plants - and the people!!! - who offer relief and remedy through medication, supplements, herbal preparations and flower essences.

~Tending to my physical form with sleep, rest, movement when I’m able, not being restrictive or rigid, eating regularly, listening to body cues about exhaustion, hunger, etc.

~SO MUCH CRYING

~Talking a lot {in therapy, to friends, to doctors, to clients, to family}

~Dark, dark humor / giving up / sinking down and in / becoming a storm

~Bright, playful humor / rising up and out / renewing hope / becoming a celebration

~Indulging in creative pursuits like knitting, writing poetry, learning Spanish, leatherworking

~Listening to music that makes my body curious and engaged

I’d encourage you to spend a few moments and pin down your definition of “Healing” and then outline what that feels like, what it looks like, and how it shows up in your life. How do YOU know you are Healing??